I bet you think this blog is about you... don't you...

Well, no its not. Why you might ask? Cause it's about me sillys!  I am uploading some photos since I have a little bit of free time between my writing and procrastinating. So by the time you wake up and check the interwebs I have something nice and fresh for you to read! Since its 6amish Austin, TX time. So, here we go!

Chickens just roam wild here. They don't fear people either.

Yoli got an AWESOME care package from her dad. Filled with nothing but delicious goodies and snacks. Reeces, Doritos, PB&J and Ritz Crackers.... Oh! Be still my beating heart. She so kindly shared with all of us and it was an instant mood booster! Twas a happy moment for all! Not just her.

My new Ethiopian sisters. H1 and H2. They told me to call them that cause their names were HARD. I don't really know what they are actually called.

I contributed to the first night this girl was drunk. Ever. I feel very privilaged as we have bonded quite a bit this month. 

The party host! He was trying to make fun of Americans, so of course being who I am, interrupted him... then corrected him on how to make fun of Americans. If you're gonna make fun of me, DO IT RIGHT.

Biggest ripoff ever. How much you wanna bet that the coffee here is a million times better than real Starbucks?

At the spice market in Harar! 

Ginger and Garlic. My grandpa would be a kid in a candy store here.

Why yes, that is a guy with a baton, and right next to me a guy with an AK-47. Just sittin there protecting and serving. 

Tis the season. Its pomegranate time!

Henna on my palm! Its not lasting as long as I would like cause of that whole gross sweaty palm problem I've got... haha.

This is the one that will last a while. Its so perdy.

"I promise I won't eat you!"

Go go gadget Hyena time!

 

 

 

 

This is the stupid hyena not eating my professor.

So there it all is!! My last uploads from Africa! I'll write an overview blog when I get back to the states, and I'll notify you all when I get back into chicago! I realize I finished this at 11:45pm Y'alls time. Keep sending your entertaining emails. Catch me up on the American shenanigans happening without me.

Oh... Ive been watching a lot of BBC, and turns out I like being unawares in the states. But now I have knowledge of world goings on... So much for sheltering myself anymore. BBC is tha bomb.

Captains log... Somali Coast.

I bet you thought I would become a silly American captured by the Somalis and held for ransom at the tip of Africa off the coast of South Africa. Silly people!! They snatched me after my Henna was complete and they obviously gave me the captains design. They declared me their leader and now I am leading their cause...

Hahaha! Just kidding. I did go to Harar, and I did get henna, but no Somalis actually snatched me. In fact there were a few people who actually hissed at our group. Those damned dirty americans!

We actually got to see some Hyenas and my professor got to feed one with a stick in his mouth. I desperately wished that the beast was going to eat my professor, but alas...No luck there.

So tonight we wound down our final night all together by going back to the goat roasting place and they provided us with a buffet that was pretty delicious. They had something that slightly resembled brisket which was very tough but it was still yummy nonetheless.

There was drinking and dancing and I taught the local ladies how to "get low" and I was taught how to do the local shoulder dance. They said I was pretty good, and those ladies could get low... I was amazed. I embarrassed my professor by knowing and singing all the words to Baby Got Back and then more and more people were like "WTF Alyssa, any song you don't know?!" Which is close to no, but I know millions of lyrics just rusty on the artist/song title. My day is yet to come. I am so super excited to shine my musical knowledge at trivia again, but I must wait til July 11th as the GWD squad are nice enough to give their QM's a day off in the name of America.

So if the fireworks aren't cancelled, WHO'S IN?!

Pics when I get back to the USA. Sorry peeps.

The Others!

I haven't spoken much about my fellow students, but for the most part they are pretty cool.  My first instincts about them were thankfully WRONG! How often do you get to hear me say that? Not very... But one thing that I happened to notice was utterly hilarious.

The girls here are pretty cool, there is more than one "know it all" other than myself of course, and she occasionally gets on my nerves but nothing extreme. Another girl makes hilarious noises when she talks which actually reminds me of myself when I get excited about things. I think the most fortunate thing about this stay here is that I'm in a room all by myself. If I had a roomie here I no doubt would be plotting her death from day 2. A couple of the other girls are "party" types and they used a lot of my shampoo and conditioner, but other than that one thing they are pretty cool. The girls staying in the room across from me are pretty awesome too. One of those girls I was trapped in Jordan with and the other one is a very quiet at first type girl, but if you get her alone she will talk your ear off. Oh me oh my...

Now on to the two dudes. Ones name is Harlan. Which is pretty cool cause I have a family friend named Harlan as well! Now I know two Harlans! Its pretty nifty. He's a good guy and gets my stupid corny jokes. Like the one I made about my laptop being such a ho cause its so slotty.

The other dude was the one I predetermined to be my BFF on this trip. He was the only person I really talked to before we all left, and it was minimal chatter mainly due to the fact that our flights were both cancelled. But the more I learned about this one the more chummy we became. We was like peas and carrots. Then one day we were talking about stuff, and he was mentioning a lot of Anime, and then he mentioned some stupid game called the Settlers of Catan or something. I don't know how to spell it, I don't care to ever play it either. Then something clicked in my head. Oh snap. I asked him immediately after "Are you a D&Der?" and he got all excited and said "YES!" Damnit. That cursed game strikes again! So across the globe I find myself with another Dungeon and Dragon fiend. I think the universe is telling me something by sending me all these great friends with a sketchy D&D past present and future. I will continue my resistance and will not succumb to the game! I will not! Some of my friends have threatened me with putting me in a game but I will not fail in my mission to be D&D free. I will not curse those who play it...anymore. I accept the fact that my lovely lover roomie plays it however most infrequently... and I will just live and let live. Honestly I'm interested in watching people play as to perhaps do some kind of thesis paper on gamer types. But that's something that is far off in the distance.

No matter where I go, there it is.

You should check out the link I added at the end of the blog. Its completely satirical, but it seems that my Textbook follows this model in many instances. My textbook is written by someone born in Kenya. In Africa... Way to perpetuate the stereotype bro.

How to write about Africa

Beast of Burden

So at our first pit-stop we were swarmed with children selling little baskets and trinkets.

The first thing that came out of my mouth was politically incorrect. "Where are we? Mexico?"

This guy had a buddy right next to the bus, which scared the living daylights out of me. I screamed then promptly slammed the window shut.

Cute wild monkey with its wild monkey baby!

Eat your heart out Michael J. Fox. I went back in time to 2004 while simultaneously traveling 8 hours into the future.

SNOW! In Africa?

I'M ON A BOAT.

Papyrus salesman.

Papyrus bracelet I made.

The devil is portrayed in blue here and I have no clue why.

This Saint rides Giant Chickens. Or he is really small, I'm not sure which.

The Blue Nile, Hungry Hungry Hippo.

My theory on why Ethiopia LOVES Obama is purely because he is black.

"Oh? Whats that? You don't have a castle?"

Prisoner. I can haz amnesty?

Vato Jesus. I know he is supposed to be black and savior-y but he looks like a man from the hood ready to pop a cap.

The sickeningly sweet Tej

I'm totally a drummer in a band.

Hitler ruins EVERYTHING!

Got to watch a chant session.

I didn't actually take this photo. Women arent' allowed in this room. The deacon took my camera and snapped some photos for me though. What a nice guy.

This was done in three years.

Hard to believe...

Girl says, "Who is that?" My reply, "Duh, Gandalf."

More real version of Jesus VS Hollywood Jesus... WHO WILL WIN?!

Don't spit on me!!!

Arabic Coke.

So there you are. All the photos I promised! Enjoy! And if you have any questions on anything feel free to ask, cause I will give you the entire backstory.

To the pain...

Well actually I'm feeling much better today. At least as far as the stresses of my day to day life in Ethiopia are going. My original response paper I turned in that was one page written, got a C-. You may ask yourself, "WHAT?! THATS IT?!" Well actually I'm quite proud of that C-. A lot of other students typed out several page papers with no spacing at 12pt font and got a C+. So considering the amount of effort I put (10 minutes and one book read) VS the effort that other people put in (a few hours plus one book read) I did exponentially better than they did.  Had I known that my work was actually noteworthy I would have put in an extra 10 or 20 minutes of writing for that B or possible A, however by the way this professor grades (like a hard ass) I was under the assumption that whatever I did wouldn't be good enough and I was going to fail these classes miserably. Now it seems I stand a chance.

So instead of battling to the death, I will battle to the pain, and create papers that make small children scream and run away in the streets. Something so amazingly grotesquely perfect that I will at least get a B in this stupid class. I still have to lead a discussion (I'm the last person presenting) and write one more summary, a term paper and a test for the linguistics class.

For the culture class I still have to read a book (due thursday), write a response on said book (which will get me at least a B+), make some kind of cultural presentation, and take a test.

The only tricky part of all of this stuff is finding the time to read that book. I'll be doing a lot of reading tonight for my class presentation and the final summary I'm doing over age and language, and yes I'm taking precious study/reading time away to dilly dally on the interwebs, but honestly if I don't get the procrastination out of my system now I'm going to go bonkers.

In brighter news my computer is finally doing what I want it to do and is attempting to upload my photos from my card to my comp. I'd given up on plugging in the camera, so the card slot will just have to do. My computer is just super slotty. Has all kinds of ports and drives and slots to mess with. Just so slotty...  Anyways, once everything is done going to my computer you will get a double dose of dis blog today that will inclue PHOTOS!!!!! YAAAAAAAAAAAAY!!!

In the meantime let me tell you how I've been holding up:
Yesterday I nearly lost my sanity what with all the stupid going on. My professor is still expecting unreasonable amounts of work but now it just seems a little more doable as I have been able to turn in 6 pages of work, and only need to turn in three pages of work tomorrow and lead a discussion. So while I was super frustrated some of the others dragged me down for dinner and I had the worst tomato soup ever, it tasted more like watered down prego or ragu more than tomato soup. But maybe I'm just accustomed to stuff thats from a can. I'm not sure if thats the case but who knows. It was terrible.

I got to talk to my loviest of lovers Alexha, and plans have been made for my glorious return to Texas. I can't wait to see all of you again as its probably going to be a stupid emotional teary return cause underneath my hard shell I'm a squishy emotional girl. I'm mostly curious as to what kind of sign I will get at the airport! Last year my darling lover held up a sign that said "Lover#1"  It was quite hilarious and I couldnt have been happier to see her! We've decided to get matchy rings and Maybe our secret thing tattood :-p The day that girl gets a tattoo hell might freeze over and cotton candy will rain from the skies...

So I think I didn't really mention what was going on while I was away so now you can have that little rundown as I will summarize an email in super shorthand type.

Day1: drove 12 hours, saw a TON of donkeys. Little burros and burritos! It started raining cats and dogs, and then as we closed in on our destination we encountered some SNOW! I know right?! SNOW IN AFRICA!!!! Yeah we were kinda high up, but we were still lower than Addis Ababa. I stayed in the ghettoest hotel in Bahadir and even with my mosquito net I still got some bites.

Day 2: toured some monasteries that were exactly the same. I saw some HIPPOS on the mouth of the Blue Nile. Yeah, thats right. De Nile is not just a river in Egypt ;) And hippos are SUPER dangerous and super territorial. After this place we drove to Gondar and toured a 16th century castle/palacial place. A pigeon scared me and I jumped across the ancient banquet hall in one fail swoop.

Day 3: Drove 14 hours to Lailibela and saw lots of donkeys and goats. Many photos of the countryside/mountains/grassland/mudhuts. Arrive in Lailibela and get to try Tej. Its about the sweetest stickiest stuff ever. When we cheers-ed My glass shattered. Hulk/Alyssa smash!

Day 4: Tour 10 different churches. Badass churches carved out of rocks and cliffs and are historically preserved now. Someone said that Jesus helped them build it. We interpreted that as the spirit of Jesus helped them carry on. Changed hotels. Power went out, we had a hotel party and the staff told us to shut up. Stupid loud americans sitting in a room talking. SO LOUD. We must promote stereotypes.

Day 5: VOMIT CITY! I woke up, drank water, and threw up. A lot. More than I drank. I didn't think I had it in me. Litterally. So I get on the bus and I get some Zofran from a friend and it keeps me calm enough that i don't puke all over the bus. can't eat, drink or think. first pit stop they trick me into drinking a coke and eating a tiny cookie. nearly threw it up.  second pit stop bus driver gets me some phenergan. Sweet dreams on the bus from then on. stop at new hotel and sleep nearly the whole time I'm there.

Day 6: 12 more hours of driving. make it home to the Ras Hotel and I can drink reasonable amounts of liquid and eat tiny amounts of food.

I've relapsed a little bit here and there, but nothing I didn't expect already. Next blog: photo time!
 

When it rains it pours

So here I am in Africa... Ethiopia to be more specific. The rainy season has just started and the following things are becoming considerably irksome:

1. Financial Aid got all jumbled
2. Professor expects to cram a whole semester into one week
3. I seem to be cracking under the pressure and I really need to get the stress out
4. too polluted to go running and get stress out.

So here I am, venting my frustration to you my friends on the wide wonderful public land known as the internet. I'm so fortunate that in my life everything seems to crumble in upon itself all at once. No matter where I am located on the globe it all seems to happen at once. I guess this is just a part of that globalization everybody keeps mentioning. Everything is linked no matter where you are, so if America fails, Everything starts failing with it.

So as far as the work I am expected to miraculously pull out of my ass, which I usually do, I have about 10 pages of writing to do tonight, and a research paper due at the end of next Tuesday, a practical project due on Monday, and another book to be completely read and responded on by Thursday. I am going to lose my mind here and I only have 11 days left. The 29th can't get here soon enough. Tomorrow we are supposed to be excursioning to the biggest market place in the world. Our bus driver (the one that drove us for a week straight) advised against it. As we are white foreigners the merchants will want nothing more than to rip us off. Since our professor wants to cram 6 hours of class in per day til Friday when we take a three day trip to Harar, he is just shoving everything down our throats and expecting us all to shit out golden bricks of the purest quality. Did I mention that it was nearly impossible to find the book I need for class? Yeah, I only have one of the required textbooks. I borrowed my profs book for tonight but it must be returned by breakfast tomorrow morning. I'm skipping the jaunt to the market because I have zero interest in getting further ripped off because of being white, and I honestly just don't have the time. I need to finish reading that stupid Lions gaze book. I was able to power though the one about the Hyenas Belly, but I can only handle so much. I doubt I even absorbed half of what the book was saying. Mostly war and death and famine and how Ethiopia went through a ton of gov't changes. This book about the Lions Gaze is very similar except its just fictional writing and nothing true like the Hyena book.

I think I'm done with study abroad for good now. This is completely ridiculous. Is it time to come home yet? I need my sanity back. I much prefer the silly chaos of home life to this trivial one semester for two classes in one week business.

/rant over

Alyssa

I was postponed, so you get a blog!!

So, I wasn't expecting to be able to write to you here today, BUT here I am. Three kids in our group got food poisoning and our professor postponed our excursion ANOTHER day. Nobody told me so I got up and got ready at 5AM and luckily someone was in the hall reading to tell me that NOPE not going anywhere. Oh well.

So let me tell you about my day.

Today I was up at 5, and up til about 9 or 10 last night. I didn't eat dinner last night cause the room service man never came. I didn't feel like going downstairs cause I had to figure out how to make 7 days worth of clothes fit into my backpack. I'm used to only shoving 3 days plus accessories/makeup/etc. So finagling 7 days plus all of that other crap and school books and an extra roll of TP and and whatnot wasn't exactly easy. But I did it. BOO YA. I still retain my title as an expert packrat. So after I was done stuffing I went to bed. I woke up many times during the night which was incredibly annoying. I still haven't succumb to taking my Ambien, but at this point if I don't get a decent night sleep I'm taking the pharmaceutical way out. I'm totally over my stupid bed too. It sags super bad in the middle so I'm sleeping like a crescent moon which is actually quite uncomfortable if you're not in a hammock. Which would be totally awesome to have out here...

After I was told that I wasn't able to do anything I just chatted with some of the other people in my group who were also uninformed and we just decided to not go back to bed. So we all hung out talking and eventually went down to breakfast. Another plate of lukewarm eggs, wheat grains, funny yellow ingera with jam, coffee with weird floaty things in it (couldn't finish it as my gag reflex jumped in hardcore) and pretend french toast sticks. They'd be good if I had some maple syrup, but I dare not ask for such an extravagance. So I grabbed a second cup of orange juice mixed with some other tropical juice instead. I love juice, and I am grateful that at least one part of my morning routine wasn't interrupted.

After breakfast I stopped by the front desk and scheduled a massage. At 150 birr I was ALL OVER THAT. I scheduled it for noon and I ended up playing cards all morning with some of the other students. We played BS, Egyptian Rat Screw, Slap Jack, Poker, Speed, and Spoons, and Crazy Eights. I had an awesome time doing that and I even won a fairly good amount of times! So noon rolls around and I kick everybody out of my room and go down to meet my wonderful ethiopian massage woman.

These people are NOT modest at all. She just told me to undress and didn't step out of the room at all like they do in America. She just stood there and waited on me so I just stripped down and hopped up on the table. It was awkward for me, but as an MT I'm sure shes had her fair share of naked people on her table. Luckily there was a fresh sheet and towel for me covered with flowers and smelling good. The actual massage felt rushed but boy howdy I desperately needed it. She might as well have been a giant woman named Helga because she dug in hard and deep on me. I was a ragdoll in her tiny hands. I should have told her to come to the USA because I would let that woman live with me and feed her and take care of her if she massaged me every day. I want one!  But afterwards I was in my relaxed massage stupor and paid her for the massage and tipped her. So in total it was 200 birr and it was totally worth it. I will definitely schedule one on my last full day here. Not a chance I'm only going to get one.

Afterwards I grabbed some lunch down in the hotel lobby which is where everybody was attributing all the food poisoning from. I live a life of very little fear when it comes to food. I'll try most everything once. But I've been sticking to the hot soups so that all the amoebas die before my bowl gets to me. The hungarian goulash soup is my new staple. I have tried many native dishes they just don't have that super appeal like I want. Today our group got into a huge conversation about all the crappy american food we all missed. Like Whataburger. Or Steaks. I want steaks more than I want a fast food burger. Feed me Seymore. I'm wasting away!

The cleaning lady swung by while I was in my massage and she caught me in the hallway and keeps begging to do my laundry so I told her it was good to do tomorrow. It will be nice to come back to fresh clean folded clothes from my excursion. Just another expense I suppose but its way cheap here and I guess I'm just supporting their economy.

So thats all I've really done today. And read more Game of Thrones. Holy cow that book is amazing. Its crazy LONG though. Worth every minute. Even if I have already watched season 1. I'm totally gonna get a kindle or ipad though. Being able to read books on an electronic tablet will actually increase my pleasure reading exponentially. There are a few books that I still need to finish out of necessity though. I neglected to bring that one with me though.

I don't have much else to say but now I'm gonna scoot as I think the illness might be upon me as well now. I guess I spoke too soon yesterday when I said I wasn't sick YET. Hah. I cursed myself. I brought my own Cipro so I'm totally set as far as that goes. WOOOO I love being prepared for anything and everything. Just goes to show how awesome I really am at traveling. I am also the only person here who got shots. But the one I neglected to get, was probably the only one I NEEDED to get. Yellow Fever. I won't be catching it wihle I'm here but I also might get questioned while abroad. We will see... I might end up getting a shot in the airport when I arrive in Chicago. I am SO looking forward to being back there for another big fat juicy Chicago dog. Mmmmm. Thats the way to go. Chicago style.

Click the link I embedded! Its a great song greatly covered! So glad my buddy sent it to me :) Thanks JP!

Fabulous link that a friend sent me.

COFFEEEEEEEEE

So this was the beginning of the coffee ceremony before the lady started fiddling with all the stuff.

The St. George beer I've been drinking. Its ethiopian brewed and bottled.

The lady getting her roast on.

Water going into jug

lovely incense

While we wait they get the Goat-B-Q going

This meat was SUPER delicious.

Still cooking. My professor is the one on the right.

Whatever this bread was... it was spicy but the flavor was HORRIBLE. I ate as much of my piece as I could but I couldn't stomach much more.

Now, the meat... I know it doesn't look good from the photo, but it was really quite delicious. The Ingera was good too! They even served us some white bread for those folks who couldn't handle the native food.

Pouring coffee in the cups

doing something to the coffee...

The lovely ethiopian actress that bought a bottle of vodka and was handing out shots all night! She was super sweet and really a beautiful person.

So the coffee roasting ceremony was really good. We partied like it was 1999 (cause thats where all my dance moves came from). I promise I did the running man perfectly and super funily. This was absolutely the best party I have ever attended in my entire life. And I've been to some pretty badass parties.

Today I spent most of my day in my room. The cleaning lady is finally comfortable with me to clean while I'm in the room. I usually am not in the room while they are there, but I've startled her enough times that shes gotten used to me being around at strange times. She is super nice, but whatever kind of dirty mop water they use makes my room smell gross. Which means they open up the window and let stupid flies in. Whatever... I can't say that I will ever get used to the nuisance of flies in my face 24/7. Its probably the worst part of this trip. Flies in my face totally suck. It's even a problem in the car when we are being taxied from place to place! SHOO FLY DON'T BOTHER ME! Since I was in my room I took breaks from reading to watch movies like PS I Love You. Yeah, if you miss people and you are abroad, do not watch anything considered drama. This is a very emotionally unstable point in my life just because I feel like I'm getting so much closer to all my friends and even my family and then I up and left just as things were getting good! Whatevs. Three weeks to go, and the next time I check in will be in a week ish. So yeah, Feel free to spam my email with interesting thoughts/questions!